A message from Gerondissa Thekla
Having entered the fourth week of
quarantine, and in view of the coming of the Holy days of Pascha, being
pressured by the stress and fear that is being imposed on us; with the pressure
developing from trying to govern the monastery under such circumstances and
with deep sadness filling my heart from the pain and sadness of the people
around us, due to their lack of certain basic necessities but mainly due to the
deprivation of the consolation and strength offered by the church attendance
and the strongest medicine, Holy Communion, brought me to seclusion and prayer.
I implored and I continually implore God to send His ineffable mercy to the
world, to heal the sick to strengthen them, to comfort the elderly and those
that are struck by loneliness and are living difficult situations.
I was somehow feeling guilty
because we at the Monastery, at these times are comforted by the sacramental
life, where on the contrary our brethren are lacking this, and I was looking
for a way to comfort them. Then I heard a voice telling me; “Remember what you
used to do?” Then, as if my mind opened, I saw and believe me, I relived (in
feeling) those unique moments.
When I first entered the
Monastery in 1975 (forty five years ago), it was at a time that the Holy
Monastery of Philotheou on Mount Athos did not number many monks and there were
very few priests. Therefore there were not enough priests to serve the
Metochia. Our Monastery was a Metochi (dependence) of the Monastery of
Philotheou, so for many years we did not have a priest to serve our needs.
Someone would come, (very rarely), throughout the year, but never on Great
Feasts: i.e. the Nativity of Christ, Pascha, Annunciation, Pentecost…, we were
always left on these holy days with no priest.
If such a situation would take place
at a Parish, the parishioners would complain, would yell, use indecent words,
maybe even curse and the only one happy from all of this would be the “tempter”
with his angels.
For us it would be the opposite.
We would fast as if preparing for Holy Communion, we would gather together in
our chapel which was an extension to a hallway, (¼ of the size of our
Monastery’s church here). We would read the services and at the end, our Most
Holy Gerondissa Makrina would “commune” us by giving us Great Holy Water and
Holy Bread. She would always counsel us that, “If we would be as we should be
spiritually, then it is possible noetically to receive Holy Communion from Holy
Angels, just like we have read many times in the lives of the Saints.”
Believe me, back then we lived
many heavenly moments which we never encountered again even after when we had a
permanent priest and would serve forty day liturgies. Now I realize that due to
the deprivation but also to the great zeal and patience we had, the Lord would
bless us with grace that accompanies martyrdom.
The chapel would be fragrant as
if someone had sprinkled it all over with myrrh. Our eyes would stream with
endless tears. Our heart would leap from the Grace of God. On the days that we
supposedly “communed”, without even realizing it, we would speak softly because
we felt as if we had partaken in some sacred ceremony. Saying the prayer, our
mouth would taste as if we had taken a very fragrant candy. We would feel the
presence of Holy Communion, even though we had not received it, and throughout
the day we would be cautious not to spit, nor chew gum and throw it out. So
great was the sense of the presence of Holy Communion. No matter what I write,
it is not possible to describe the feeling of Christ’s grace that we lived back
in those days of deprivation, because there are not words to express this. A
few years later, at the Holy Monastery of Philotheou, the number of priests
grew and we no longer had a problem needing a priest; everything found its
place in our monastery.
After 19 years, when obedience
brought myself and sister Ephraimia here to Canada, we again encountered the
same problem; the lack of priests. For 7 years, our Monastery did not have a
priest. But now it was not so bad because the priests here had the order from
the Archbishop to come during the week and serve the Divine Liturgy, so that we
would commune. However, again Saturdays and Sundays and feast days we would not
have a priest. The priests had to serve at their own parishes and communities.
So, we would read the services, on our own, decorate the icons, the Cross for
the Elevation of the Holy Cross, and for the Sunday of the veneration of the
Cross during Great Lent; we would bring out the Lord’s Cross on Holy Thursday;
and we would try to raise the morale of the young novices, who had complete
inexperience of these things.
These, along with so many more
are now a wealth of experiences that exists inside of us and whenever it is
needed we open the “treasure box” of experiences and we choose whatever is
needed depending on the circumstance.
Then suddenly, as if my nous
opened and I relived all of this spiritual state very intensely, as it being an
answer to my prayer; the message being that whoever prepares themselves with
humility, without grumbling and protesting, but with much prayer and faith in
the Providence of God, and receives Holy water and Holy Bread in replacement of
Holy Communion and contemplates that theoretically “God did not permit me to
receive Holy Communion, as being “unworthy and unprepared”, then this person
will be filled by God’s grace of endurance of martyrdom, of which Saint Luke
the doctor would say: “I loved much the grace of martyrdom, which so
wonderfully cleanses the soul”.
The tempter wanted to close the
churches; let us make our homes into churches. He shut 11 churches; let us open
11 thousand. May each home become a church; let prayer be raised like a torch
of fire towards heaven; let the incense fragrance all the neighbourhoods; may
the candle and the vigil lamp always be lit. Let us attend the services through
electronic correspondence, praying together, and not lying down, or eating, or
smoking. If we do this, instead of closing down the churches, they will grow
and spread and whole cities will become churches. Then God will give His
blessing, and seeing our repentance and our faith He will cast away this evil
plague and give us the freedom along with our churches to live many years
working for Him.
I wish you a Blessed Holy week, a
spiritual ascent, a double well-being of spirit and soul, patience and
unwavering trust in God’s Providence, so that the light of the Resurrection
will shine forth in our hearts and replenish us with the gifts of the Most Holy
Spirit. Amen.
“Blessed and Bright
Resurrection!”
With infinite love in Christ
Τhe least in Christ,
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